Live Big
As you can tell, I was just born to be famous. I had the haircut of the moment (hello Dorthy Hamill) and a fur-rimmed jacket that even J.Lo would envy. And check out the hand in one pocket, so pimp!
This picture was taken at the Shore Acres Botanical Gardens in Coos Bay, Oregon. I used to think this place was magical, especially around Christmas when they would place festive lights all around the gardens. I haven’t been back to Coos Bay since my sister Gina and I had to transition my aunt and uncle into a nursing home facility back in 2006. My uncle was pushing 100 and my aunt had a debilitating stroke. They never had any kids so it was all left to the nieces and nephews to deal with the situation.
I’ll never forget how hard it was to pack the contents of their house. We had to throw away so much junk -30 years worth of it. If they had something in the house, they had two broken ones in the basement. And we would find really odd things like the ziploc bags full of hundreds of small ramen noodle seasoning packets stored in the kitchen cupboards. My aunt only used a half a packet and saved the extras for later. You know, just in case.
The two of them had few things of value. Just the antique Korean lacquer furniture and some pieces of gaudy jewelry. What they had was important to them. My uncle had a lazyboy recliner that was so well loved that if someone else sat in it, it wouldn’t feel right. He slept, read and ate in that thing and took it to the nursing home with him. My aunt on the other hand had about 20 different plastic combs to fluff up her frizzy grey hair and when my sister threw them all out, save for one – let’s just say it wasn’t a pretty day.
The deconstruction of someone’s life into two boxes and some personal effects is a sobering. It makes you realize that you should really divert your energy into having big experiences, not lots of things. Because in the end you can’t take it with you and you don’t want to be lamenting the loss of a blue comb.
Tags: childhood, childhood photos, coos bay, gomo, live big, shore acres, uncle
This entry was posted on Monday, November 10th, 2008 at 7:37 am and is filed under Daily, Midthirties Crisis. Both comments and pings are currently closed.
14 Responses to “Live Big”
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Hey there I found your blog on IheartSP. It still amazing to me how many awesome writers AND single moms there are out there in cyberspace. Glad to have found yours and I can’t wait to read more!
P.S. You look like Little Red Riding Hood in that picture. What little girl DIDN’T have a red coat at some point in their life? I think our parents had alterior motives.
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I never had the red coat (though I did have a fave green snowsuit with a red apple patch on it) but I sure had that haircut!
And I know that feeling all to well – when I was in my early 20s I had to pack away my grandmother’s things when she moved into a nursing home. I was the only surviving grandchild so much of it went home with me. Trying to decide what to keep and what to let go wasn’t easy. Vivian was a lifelong Republican and to this day I have her elephant jewelry I don’t know what to do with!
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You write so beautifully, and made a very cute kid! x
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Interesting, interesting. I definitely have way too much stuff and need to get rid of a lot (I really don’t need 40 clever t-shirts). I agree that experiences are much more worthwhile.
I definitely dig your writing style. I will be back
. Looking forward to the next 20 days and beyond.
keenahn´s last blog post..Process/Product 045 – A Brief History Of Hair
I was born and raised in Coos Bay! Every year we’d go to Shore Acres for the Christmas Lights. A few years I even volunteered to help set up the lights. I try to go back every year when I’m home for Christmas. It does feel magical. It reminds me of MY childhood innocense. Which is long, long gone! lol Thanks for the warm fuzzy memories!
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Okay, could you have been cuter? No. Sorry. I volunteer in an ER and last night had a patient who was a widow and we talked a lot about how she didn’t know how to throw anything out but wanted to move with her life but didn’t know where to begin. It was such a wonderful conversation, me the divorcee and her the widow. It was amazing how much we have in common. She is the reason why I give my free time to this hospital.
Beautifully written. I would have to say one of my faves so far.
By the by … you still have the same sparkle in your eyes when you smile. You can already see the depth of your character forming in this adorable pic despite all that was happening around you.
My husband and I moved his mother into a small apartment last year and dealt with many of the same challenges. What to do with the two red plastic spoons from Dairy Queen? Kind of heartbreaking to think life came down to just the memories that could be stirred up by a simple object saved from an ice cream trip. In the end, we kind of decided – well, it’s all she has, and what does it really matter if it makes her happy to go through that stuff over and over again?
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Cute pic….:)
My grandparents finally moved from a large home to a smaller 2 bedroom apt (their choice as they were getting older and wanted a smaller place to maintain). I don’t know if it was harder for me or them. My grandmother is lovingly called the hoarder in our family and she had a zillion of everything. My grandfather is a minimalist (?) so it’s interesting watching the two of them. Anyway, my grandmother had to give away or throw away ALOT of many many years worth of stuff. What she kept the most of was her photos. She said being able to look at them was what brought back all the wonderful memories of her life. (that always makes my eyes water). We are talking photos of when her and my grandfather were married in 1950, some of her when a child in the late 30′s to mid 40s…it’s great history (MY history). She and my grandfather has and does live a great life…thank you for reminding me it’s not about the size of their place of residence but the life they continue to live…:) (Heart, hug you)
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*so* powerfully written and i love the glimpse into your world.
thank you.
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I dig Shore Acres at Christmas as well. You’re just up in Seattle – how come you don’t bounce down to the OC more often?
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I love this post. So true, like John Lennon said “Oh boy, when you’re dead, you can’t take nothing with you but your soul…” I’m going to try to remember that the next time I think I just can’t live without something. I remember during the breakdown of my grandparents’ household, their children bickered and argued about every item — the couch, the cookware, the bed. And while they did that, I scooped up the photos; THAT was the real treasure.
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Hey there..just found your blog and am enjoying it. Just had to mention that I, too, had that bowl cut. Is that like an Asian standard or what? The funny thing is that my mom used to cut my hair, my sister’s, and my dad’s…so we were all sporting the Asian bowl cut! Sad news…my dad still lets my mom cut his hair! That’s love I guess.
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So far I am really impressed with your site. The quality of your content and nice design makes it a real winner!