Parents Just Don’t Understand
The other day I got an email from the school district calling for an urgent meeting:
11/07/09
Subject: VHS Dance Discussion
All Welcome to Attend
A meeting for Islanders to discuss and develop alternatives to “grinding” at VHS dance will be held. The meeting will focus on complimentary activities, dance and music options, successful changes in other districts.
Okay. I get it. Nobody wants to think of their 15 year old daughter shaking her moneymaker on the dance floor. Grinding is a little different then say, the Rock Lobster – which was big when I was in high school. But clearly, these people don’t know how to deal with teenagers. Anytime you say “ban” and these kids are gonna revolt. C’mon people! Choose your battles! Know your audience! They are not going to want to line dance (yes, it was suggested) or salsa dance (that one too). Last time I checked, a ‘do si do’ did not go with Soulja Boy Tell ‘em.
Thinking back on the history of dance moves, I personally have always thought the Macarena should have been banned. I mean, if you are going to start with something obscene, start with that one. But apparently, I live in Footloose land and the topic of concern is not the school budget crisis or advancing curriculum – it is whether or not the kids should be allowed to grind.
And apparently, no matter what side of the fence I am on, I am a fuddy duddy, once again:
Me: Paige, did you hear about that parent meeting?
Paige: You mean the one about “grinding?”
Me: Yeah, that one. Do kids “grind” at the dances?
Paige: Pshaw! Mom, everyone grinds. That what us young’uns do.
Me: Like guy and girl? Or girl on girl?
Paige: EVERYONE GRINDS. Guy on guy, girl on girl, girl on guy – EVERYONE.
Me: But you don’t grind, do you?
Paige: I said EVERYONE grinds. That’s how we dance. But we are boycotting the dances from now on because they won’t let us dance the way we want to.
Me: Oh really?
Paige: They don’t get it. It’s either let us grind or we are going to go to parties and get drunk and then grind. And then they’ll loose out on the money from the dances.
Me: I see. You are going to parties and getting drunk to protest?
Paige: WHY DO YOU ALWAYS DO THAT? You just don’t understand!
Clearly, she doesn’t realize that I am from the Footloose generation. I UNDERSTAND. I just don’t want her ending up looking like this. Is that so wrong?
If anything, watch it for the shoes – I owned about ten out of the twenty that were featured. Bobby socks with pumps – oh my!
20 Responses to “Parents Just Don’t Understand”
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At my high school prom, people were grinding. It seemed more innocuous when it was two girls, but watching some of the guy-girl couples grinding left me thinking “ugh, get a room!” That being said, I would absolutely be uncomfortable with the thought of my 15-year-old daughter doing so with either gender. I’m an equal opportunity “that’s my *daughter* you’re touching” kind of person (and the same goes for my sons — a “hussy” can be female or male).
Now, I’m still young enough to also see it from Paige’s side. If you ban it at school, she’s absolutely right — they’re not going to go to the school dance. At school, they’re not going to have alcohol. At another venue? Yeah, things get a bit sketchy. While I don’t have experience personally, I can say from my own observations that grinding and alcohol lead to other places — places that aren’t generally available at school (let’s not go into that recent gang raping thanks to some very irresponsible school officials). I hate the expression, but it’s one of those “slippery slopes.”
Just one question… How is the Macerna obscene???
Other than that I am definitely on your side.
I think the macarena dance is obscene in a different way. It’s crazy and scary when I see people do it!
WOW. These are things I never think about with my little almost-two-year-old. Am scurred.
I hate the macarena. It SHOULD be banned.
.-= Jen L.´s last blog ..My Time of Day =-.
You do realize why it scares the parents to think of our kids “grinding” on the dance floor don’t you? Because in the 70s and 80s, we were doing the same thing. The disco dancing of that era was just as sexually provocative to our parents as grinding is today to us. It gets worse with every generation. So if you think grinding is bad in your daughter’s and my daughter’s generation, I can’t even begin to wrap my brain around the dances of their child’s generation – can you?
Susan
Over at “RaisinToast”
.-= Susan´s last blog ..Please Help Find Morgan Harrington! =-.
I remember this “grinding” be an issue when I was in middle school and high school. In middle school, the administration dealt with the problem by keeping the lights on during school dances. In high school, they threatened to cancel the dances. When that didn’t go over well, we had an assembly where the administrative staff DEMONSTRATED what was not appropriate dancing and what was appropriate dancing…
.-= Renee´s last blog ..I’m Bald… =-.
We learned the Macarena in gym class. It was pretty terrible.
As for grinding, it took place at my high school prom, as well. It was pretty disgusting when I was in the same age group. It was mostly the popular people that did it. I just ate stuff off to the side and sulked.
.-= Meghan´s last blog ..Catch a Falling Star and Put It In Your Pocket… =-.
I love teen reasoning though. That they kids have decided to party, get drunk and grind is priceless. And that you two have the kind of relationship that she tells you about the big plans…awesome!
.-= Nicki´s last blog ..Just another snapshot of my life… =-.
So the Butterfly and the Tootsie Roll are not popular anymore?
Pick your battles. Agreed.
.-= Jenny @ http://motherlawyercrazywoman.blogspot.com/´s last blog ..Strong =-.
This post cracks me up! I totally forgot all about the grinding days. There are other hip dance moves out there besides grinding,is that the default move? Does anyone remember the scene in knocked up where his friends notice that he is “rolling the dice” a lot and they say “well thats pretty much all he’s got”
Oh my! Isaiah (who is two) and I have arguments- but they include:
Me: OH HELL NO! NO MORE ELMO!
I: Elmos loves mommy.
Me: Mommy hates Elmo… lets Rock of Love!!!
I: Rock “Em Rub
OR
Me: Please don’t eat your bogeys… they are gross… Dr. Oz says you can get an infection from damaging your mucus membranes.
I: *Blank Stare*
Me: I am just sayin’ Dr. Oz knows what he is saying.
I: I pooped.
Me *shrug and thinking* “Can’t save ‘em all Hasselhoff”…. Go show Daddy your poop.
I’m happy to see that when all is said and done….it always comes down to “SHOES”….
BTW….Renee’s comment cracked me up. Gee… I wonder if YouTube was around then. I’d love to see these demos!
.-= Barb Jacobucci´s last blog ..This season…it’s all about the suede! =-.
When I was in HS kids were dancing like that but I’m sure it’s nowhere near what it’s like today. Grinding looks like sex, just standing up while wearing clothes. So yeah.
Kids did it when I was in school as well, but it was only certain kids. It was the kid that everyone knew was having sex already, and the kids who were not having sex were doing it as a joke because it does look like two monkeys doing the mating dance to a rhythmic beat.
You can’t win, dude.
.-= Aimee Greeblemonkey´s last blog ..November Greeblepix Contest! =-.
I don’t get the girl-on-girl grinding. I mean…I get it. I get why they’re doing it. But why do they feel like they have to do it? Who the hell started this? I remember going out to a club with my younger brothers a few years back – a totally different experience when you’re a mom of teens, btw – and I was horrified at all the girls making out on the dance floor while the guys stood watching.
I mean…I’m no prude. But seriously…this is what the girls think they have to do for attention? I thought we were making progress here. This doesn’t feel like progress.
I can see how it’s pretty nasty,
I’m a teenager && me && my friend were laughing at how dumb && nasty the girl’s and guys looked grinding on each other at this dance. But, me and my friends were grinding on each other because it’s fun, not for the attention. Later, that night, though, I became a hypocrite because I started grinding on this guy I had just met about 20 minutes before. It’s really fun actually, and it just makes you feel intimate without actually having sex or kissing, although he did kiss me.. sweetly, though. Not make-out or anything. I can see the negatives about grinding, but I think the positive’s outweigh them.
Me & my fellow classmates use your blogs as our reference materials. We look out for more interesting posts from your end about the same topic . Even the future updates about this topic would be of great help.
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