Day One Anxiety

January 5th, 2010

I have a lot of anxiety about tomorrow. I have a date. No, no, not THAT kind of date. Not yet, at least. I have a date with a personal trainer. Being bit overweight and in total denial about my cardiovascular health, nothing terrifies me more than working out with a personal trainer. They might make me accountable or help me to lose weight or something. Geezzz …

First dates with personal trainers generally mean:

(a) They weigh you with their big mean industrial scale – which, for whatever reason has no personality and tells you things like you weigh 15 lbs more than your scale at home. On the contrary, your Tanita scale at home is forgiving and tells you things like, “Pssst … if you weigh yourself naked after you pee in the morning, those 2 donuts you just ate last night wont count.”

(b) They pinch you with something called a caliper. Just in case you didn’t know, a caliper is an instrument that measures your fat. Basically, they pinch your spare tire and measure how big of a gut you are lugging around. EXCEPT, they do that to your back fat, bat wings, saddle bags, etc. You find yourself feeling like a piece of meat, but no one ever gives you kudos on how nicely that fat is marbled into the flesh.

(c) Push ups & pull ups. Ugh.

(d) Running and talking. Talking and running. “Are you winded at level 3? How about 4? What about at an incline? Huh? What? How does that feel? Do you feel like crying? Well, then that’s too bad. I want you to feel like throwing up. All over the place.”

And then there’s the aftermath. Where you realize that you have muscles in places that you didn’t know existed … because they now HURT. And you are sorry, so very sorry, for spending those consecutive Saturdays curled up in bed watching bad movies on Netflix on demand.

Sigh.

I know that it will probably be fine and that I have nothing to worry about. I know that Ariel will be nice and supportive and not scream at me like Jillian from THAT SHOW or be overly cheerful and perky or my try to be my new best friend.

This is my anxiety today and I’m sticking to it.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, January 5th, 2010 at 3:20 pm and is filed under Daily, Weight Loss. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

14 Responses to “Day One Anxiety”

  1. Chris Says:

    January 5th, 2010 at 3:55 pm

    You can do it! It’s a new year with all sorts of promise. Much luck to you and my suggestion – take an aspirin BEFORE you go. :-)
    Chris´s last blog ..A few more articles I found My ComLuv Profile

  2. Jen L. Says:

    January 5th, 2010 at 4:24 pm

    Allow Jen to make you feel better:
    When I went to my first appointment with a personal trainer at my gym in NYC, it was a guy named Danny. He had braces, which for some reason was hysterically funny to me, because they made him look 11 years old. He pinched me with the thinger and I almost fell over giggling. (Am ticklish.) Somewhere around the end of the first HOUR, I was dying and begging for mercy aloud. Then he made me run up some stairs. That was when I began to curse at Danny…and he cursed right back. THAT was when I knew Danny and I were destined to be together and he remained my trainer for the next 2 years. I wish the same for you. :)
    Jen L.´s last blog ..Two Years, Part 2 My ComLuv Profile

  3. Meghan Says:

    January 5th, 2010 at 8:26 pm

    How does that feel? Do you feel like crying? Well, then that’s too bad. I want you to feel like throwing up. All over the place.

    Thank you. You are wonderful. Because that is exactly how I hear them in my head, too.
    Meghan´s last blog ..Ten on Tuesday… AGAIN! My ComLuv Profile

  4. Meghan Says:

    January 5th, 2010 at 8:28 pm

    Rather, you don’t actually hear them in your head, you hear them in real life. Whereas, I just hear them in my head. I am working on getting to the gym, but am still too scared to ask for help. Thought I would clarify: You are that much further ahead and I am really that crazy.
    Meghan´s last blog ..Ten on Tuesday… AGAIN! My ComLuv Profile

  5. Rachael Says:

    January 5th, 2010 at 8:32 pm

    A while ago when I lived in Seattle I had a personal trainer for a couple of months. I was fat, weighed over 250 when I started with him and I’m 5′7″. It was totally fine. He NEVER made me feel bad or pushed me too hard, he was great. It was scary, but I found out the first day that I didn’t have anything to fear. I think that most personal trainers become that because they really want to help people. So, hopefully it will go well!

  6. Nicki Says:

    January 6th, 2010 at 6:04 am

    Wow. I feel your pain. This is why I don’t have a personal trainer. Okay, this and money. (The joys of being a single mom getting no child support…) Good luck. I’ll be thinking of you.

    PS. Nice marbling…
    Nicki´s last blog ..Random musings… My ComLuv Profile

  7. Meredith Says:

    January 6th, 2010 at 7:38 am

    Mmm, marbling. Oh wait, we’re not talking about last night’s steak (incredible flippin’ deal at the store)? Ugh. Well, hang in there! Your trainer’s going to help you see your goals attained. Deep breaths, deep breaths.

  8. Vanessa Says:

    January 6th, 2010 at 8:09 am

    I’ve never commented before, but have been reading this blog since you were on CNN.com. I started with a personal trainer at the gym six weeks ago. She is mean but I feel so good when I’m done. Enjoy it…the payoff is worth it.

  9. adhocmom Says:

    January 6th, 2010 at 9:58 am

    I recently survived a personal trainer experience. . to make matters worse, HIS NAME WAS ROMEO. I moved onto a super swell trainer with a regular name (Anthony) when he started handing out t-shirts that read “body by Romeo.” I wasn’t so much offended, as afraid my fat-ass wouldn’t be deemed endorsement worthy.

    You can do it. . .

    Paula
    http://www.adhocmom.com
    adhocmom´s last blog ..Can I Earn as Much As a Publishing Assistant Circa 1996? My ComLuv Profile

  10. It's All in the Mind Says:

    January 6th, 2010 at 11:34 pm

    This may be the boost of encouragement and support you need. Not easy to admit you can’t do it entirely on your own. So that in itself is a great step. Step away from those donuts and step into new health … and a rockin’ bod. (well, maybe a donut here and there once in a blue moon). Can’t wait to read updates. :o )

  11. J Says:

    January 7th, 2010 at 1:19 am

    My personal trainer was pigging out on her second fudge popsicle when I showed up for my appointment. She proceeded to unwrap a third one as she kicked my ass all over the gym. Nevertheless, I appreciated her efforts because it was the first time I really felt good after working out. I think in the end it’s worth it. Good luck!

  12. Bonnie Says:

    January 7th, 2010 at 9:57 am

    I am sure you did fantastic and you will look back on this day in a month and marvel at your progress. Good luck!
    Bonnie´s last blog ..TIME Magazines All Time Top 100 Novels My ComLuv Profile

  13. Maura @ Maura Me to Love Says:

    January 12th, 2010 at 3:08 pm

    Dying to know how the personal trainer meeting went…did they go Jillian on you? Can’t wait to read!

  14. Foodie McBody Says:

    January 14th, 2010 at 10:14 pm

    I want to hear a reportback!! I loooooooooooooove my personal trainer so much. He is really a personal life transformer. It is so freaking awesome to feel strong, especially cardiovascularly. It can suck at first (I cried and puked a lot) but it just gets better and better and better and better. I hope you have a good chemistry with your PT, because if you do, there’s no stopping you.
    Foodie McBody´s last blog ..My Scale, My Friend My ComLuv Profile

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