Through The Looking Glass

Wednesday, September 1st, 2010

Paige has always been fascinated by the Alice in Wonderland story. It didn’t hurt that Johnny Depp was in the most recent film adaptation. That girl LOOOOVEEESS some Johnny Depp. Really now, who doesn’t? Did you see him in that John Dillinger movie? Huzzah.

The only beef I have with Alice in Wonderland is that inevitably your kid will ask you the big question – “What is a hookah?” One could respond with something like, “Well dear, it’s something imaginary that they made up for the caterpillar part. It’s not real.” But eventually, your kids will get smarter and will realize that you are talking in platitudes. That’s when you know the jig is up.

As a parent you can go down one of two roads: maintain the lie and build upon it OR tell the truth. I chose the truth – “Paige, hookahs are meant for sharing tea. That’s why they have so many straws. Duh.”

Okay. Maybe that wasn’t exactly the truth. But that’s the great thing about parenting – the job never ends. You can make a lot of mistakes and you still get to do it again tomorrow. It is the ultimate Groundhog Day.

At this juncture, Paige realizes that hookahs are not just for caterpillars. It’s pretty obvious that hookahs are not meant for tea either – no one that she knows would dare expose themselves to a potential “backwash” situation like that. Eeeew. Gross.

Obviously, I am still working on graceful answers to questions along those lines. Let’s just hope we don’t get started on the whole, “When Alice eats the mushroom …” discussion anytime soon.

Posted in Daily, Parenting | 6 Comments »

This Daughter Of Mine …

Wednesday, June 30th, 2010

I used to think that Paige was just perfect between the ages of 7 and 10. I fondly look back and call that time period “The Golden Years” for the following reasons:

1. She thought that I knew everything and reveled in awe about how smart I was.
2. We started having adorable 2-way conversations about abstract topics like religion – Me: Do you believe in God? Paige: No, I believe in Gods.
3. She started telling silly jokes and thought that she was H-I-L-A-R-I-O-U-S (therefore she was hilarious).
4. I could sew her a wizard’s cloak and she thought I was magic.
5. She still let me hold her hand.

After the age of 10, Paige started to turn on me. She started making me do things like go to Abercrombie & Fitch, Hollister and Gilly Hicks all in one day (which is just cruel). She ran up my phone bill by sending something like 15,000 text messages in one month (this really happened). She started spending all of her free time on an island and not with me (and now I live on that same island just so I could spend more time with her). She stopped holding my hand (even when no one was looking). Obviously, this was all very traumatic for me.

Lately though, I have started to think that we’ve hit another magical period in our relationship. I thought this wouldn’t happen again for a long while – especially after a series of meltdowns and those four dark, dark months where every sentence started with, “I MOVED TO THIS ISLAND FOR YOU ….” Just the other day as we were walking next to each other she threw her arm around my shoulders and said, “I am taller than you.” My point is, she actually made physical contact with me – in public even!

I’ll try not to hope for such a radical shift in mother/daughter dynamics. I don’t expect that I will stop using the “I moved to this island for you …” line anytime soon (I’ve gotten too attached to the phrase). But who knows what will happen tomorrow – I may just get a hug.

Posted in Daily, Parenting | 11 Comments »

Outnumbered

Monday, June 28th, 2010

There are times in my life when I think I should have had another child. However, as a 20 something single mother it never seemed like an opportune time. I was young, selfish and immature – barely able to support the child that I had. Then 20 came and went. Then 22. And 25. And 27.

“Would it seem weird to have a 7 year old and a baby?” I would ask myself. Yes, it would seem weird. I was just settling into who I was again and the thought of going through the midnight feedings and diapers was unbearable. I finally decided that 30 was the cut off age. If I didn’t have another child at that point, then it wasn’t going to happen for me. Year 30 flew past me. As did 33, 34 and 35. Paige is almost 16 and I am now 36.

From time to time I feel a bit of remorse over not having the second, especially since Paige is so good with other kids younger than she. I would have loved to see her be a big sister to some lucky sibling, but it wasn’t in the cards for us. My life is on a different trajectory. Plus, at 36 I know myself better. I wouldn’t have been able to hack having the second child. I am still a bit selfish and immature. I don’t do well when I am outnumbered.

These are the freshly painted fingers and toes of Eloise. She and her brother Jacob spent the afternoon with us while their parents, Matt and Mary, had an anniversary brunch in Seattle.

At one point in the afternoon, Jacob woke from his nap and realized that he wasn’t nestled in the security of his own home. Understandably, he was quite verklempt over the notion that there was some round faced Asian woman trying to comfort him instead of his parents. This would freak me out too.

He was hungry and crying so I ended up making lunch with him balanced on my hip with one arm free to stir, pour and plate our meal of Annie’s Mac and Cheese. It wasn’t easy for me. I even had Paige in the other room keeping Eloise company so it wasn’t like I was by myself. I thought about Mary cooking for these two young kids day after day and it made me tired. I don’t think I could have managed it. For two hours, yes. For two days even. But everyday? I don’t think so. Oh God. No way.

Hat’s off to all of you who are outnumbered by your kids.

Posted in Daily, Parenting | 14 Comments »